Two poems by Holly Day

Left Over

She wears her mother’s winter coat, reflects
on the life her mother never had—all the sacrifices
the husband that was never there,
and when he was, he wasn’t the one she’d imagined

married at sixteen years and so much in love so
flamboyant, faded photos on the mantle
a smile no one ever saw, collapsing seduction
fading into the gray woman who held her daughter
and cried. And now

the woman looking at the old photographs
has become her mother, wearing
her clothes and fighting against this natural
orientation. She remembers the small woman, grown old
in this same house, lawnmower
squealing banging in the back yard, echoing her father’s

private mantra of muttered terror. It’s easy to forgive
now, after all this time, and again,
she thanks God they had the sense
to keep guns out of the house.

 

Sparkling

I’m practicing becoming his shadow, taking two steps back so that I follow him
close enough to answer his questions, nod appreciatively at his comments
mutter “hm” and “oh, sure” at the appropriate times. One has to follow close enough
that he knows you’re together, but not so close that if he stops, or moves his arms wildly
he might trip over you, clock you with an elbow, hurt either of you in some way.
Knowing the distance between bodies required to be a shadow is a learned skill.

I’m practicing becoming invisible, reducing myself to a shadow when not in use
some unseen force dancing in front of the stove, the sink, a ray of sunshine when needed
anywhere that’s dark in the house. My arms bristle with baskets of dirty laundry,
my hands are full of dirty dishes, my mouth is full of comforting words
every step I take has a purpose, I am always on my way to fixing something
cleaning something, I am proving I belong here, I am worth keeping.

Holly Day’s poetry has appeared in Asimov’s Science Fiction, Grain, and Harvard Review. Her poetry collections include Where We Went Wrong (Clare Songbirds Publishing), Into the Cracks (Golden Antelope Press), Cross Referencing a Book of Summer (Silver Bow Publishing), and The Tooth is the Largest Organ in the Human Body (Anaphora Literary Press).